Five of Swords Not everything is worth bickering about

Today’s question to draw a card with is part of the April Tarot Challenge by @Lionharts on IG. Yes, you have read it correctly: I am participating in an IG challenge again. I might not complete it but for now, I am enjoying it a lot.

"How can I make the most of this weekend?" And I got the Five of Swords. This card is telling me to avoid conflict about trivial matters. It's a waste of energy and it will only spoil the mood of this wonderful  Spring weekend with lots of sunshine and warm temperatures. Too often conflicts are mostly about ego needing to be right and victorious and they are poison to a loving relationship. So how do I try to let go of this desire?

The Emperor: clearly I need to let go of the need to be in control all of the time. This is a reoccurring theme in my personal readings lately. More and more I feel this urge is getting the better of me and in the end, it’s never worth the cost.

What energy could feed my intention to pay close attention to the advice of the two previous cards?

The Wheel: another old friend who comes along quite frequently regardless of what deck I use. This card only confirms what The Emperor has been telling me all along. Life moves in circles and we have to figure out when it is time to speak up and when it is time to let go. Choose your battles wisely and timely and enjoy life as much as you can. There is some much joy to be found in the little things. Let’s not waste our time by quarreling and squabbling over nothing.

Queen of Swords – Me and my journal

Today’s card is the Queen of Swords from the Spirit Within Tarot by Steven Bright. As you all know I identify highly with this queen and I was pleasantly surprised when I saw how Steven has captured her in his deck.

We see a woman sitting at her desk in front of her laptop, scratching her head with a pencil. She is obviously pondering what to write next; how to formulate her words in a way they will describe her feelings and ideas as clearly as possible. It feels so natural to see myself in her place. It is almost as if the silhouettes are inviting us to put ourselves or others in the depictions of the deck.  

I like to journal, almost on a daily basis. It helps me to get my mind in order and to think in a more linear way, which can be a good thing when your mind sometimes resembles a merry go round. Also, I feel that writing things down makes them more real, more tangible. I’ve been journaling since I was ten years old so I can hardly imagine myself without a journal by my side.

And then I was wondering what she was journaling about and I got …the Nine of Pentacles. This is a favorite of mine in any deck. Although I don’t shy away from writing about sad and painful things, I do like to emphasize what is beautiful, magical and delightful in life. Focusing on the sad stuff comes naturally to many of us. It used to be that way for me too. So nowadays I’d like to push myself a bit further and try not to write only about the clouds but even more so about their silver linings. Like the lady in this card, I have so much to be grateful for.

Eight of Coins - Strengthening my Attention span

Today’s card is the Eight of Coins from the Legacy of the Divine Tarot. We see a man studying the designs he has made for his coins. There is something not entirely right and he doesn’t seem to be able to pinpoint it as of yet.  He is however determined to create the perfect coins and he isn’t likely to give up.

I envy this craftsman’s perseverance, and ability to focus on a project for as long as he needs to bring it to perfection or at least to finish it. When I was younger my ability to concentrate was so much stronger. Nowadays my focus is much more fragmented. Reading for hours, studying a subject until I have discovered all the nitty-gritty details, seems to be qualities that I no longer possess.  And to be quite frank, I miss it. Oh, I do get things done and I am still able to learn new things but it feels different.  Somehow, I also believe this isn’t only caused by my aging but also by the diverting aspect of the internet. I mean the days when I went to the library to study are long gone. Reading a book from A to Z, because it was the only source of information you can find feels like ages ago.

Today this card encourages me to practice my ability to focus; to set small achievable goals as reading two chapters from my book instead of one and to diminish my screen time. Small steps….

New Moon in October

For this new moon, I have pulled one card from the Raven’s Prophecy Tarot as to what energy I should embrace during this next cycle of the Moon and I got The World.

After having pulled the Six of wands, the card of victory and celebration, for the two previous new moons, this card seems to encourage me to continue on this journey of well being and fulfilment

In this version of The World, we see a road with one intersection, heading towards the mountains in the distance.  For me, this symbolizes that even though we sometimes appear to have lost our path, it is always right in front of us. No need to retrace our steps or to take a turn to the left or right because going forward is the only way for us to live: Step by step, minute by minute.  Besides experiencing our life’s journey as linear, we also appear to journey in spirals: Every new cycle we start at the next winding of our spiralling path, always forward always changing; jumping from The World into the Fool’s position over and over again

The World card invites us to become aware of our accomplishments in life: not only of our successfully finished projects but also of the inner transformations we have gone through over the years. It is asking us to consider where we have come from and how we got here. Looking back, we might discover that the most difficult and challenging experiences probably have brought us the deepest feeling of fulfilment and belonging.

The first ten days of this lunation I will still be busy with my shadow work challenges, which have already brought up a lot of demanding issues. Of course, these issues do not entirely consist of darkness so I will be trying to also excavate the gifts and treasures hidden beneath the surface of these issues and give them the attention they deserve.

Also, I want to ponder about what my intentions are for my future journey: what needs to change and what is making me feel utterly content right now?

Perfect questions for journaling or just for sitting in my chair, listening to the wind in trees… and letting my mind whirl along with the dancing leaves

Night Song – Here goes nothing

Yesterday evening I pulled Nightsong – Hidden Talents from the Halloween Oracle and this morning I decided I wanted to write about this card instead of pulling another one. We see a beautiful red colored bird sitting on a branch at night just before he is going to burst into song. Because it is quite rare for birds to sing at night, it was often seen as a bad omen.  But for the more positive minded people, it could be a sign of good fortune too. A bird singing at night could also be considered to be “able to direct us towards discovering our talents and true purpose – a kind of guide in the darkness leading us to the dawn.”

This got me thinking about my own hidden talents and I couldn’t come up with anything. Of course, I know I can draw and write but that’s nothing new. This card is about the hidden talents. Then I thought:  “Let’s draw some more cards about it” and I drew three cards for three talents. (Perhaps a bit presumptuous?) The cards were quite positive but still, it didn’t feel right and I went to bed and stopped thinking about it. This morning when I saw the Nightsong card again, little by little it dawned on me because now I realize you cannot go searching for hidden talents or draw cards to reveal them.  No, you have to do the work or better said you have to start playing with the mindset of “Here goes nothing”, just like when we were children.  If I had never picked up crayons and paper when I was a child, I would have never have discovered I had a talent for drawing and painting. Somehow along the way, a lot of us have lost the open-mindedness of a child to try out new things without expectations. And now, as adults we seem to walk in darkness, frantically searching for our authentic self. Perhaps if we would try to relax and enjoy playing and experimenting more, then who knows what treasures we might find, hidden in some dark unexplored corner of our soul.

Daughter of Grails – Are your dreams worth following?

Today’s card is the Daughter of Grails (Cups) from the Tarot of Vampyres. A beautiful young vampire is sitting on a rock with her feet in the water. She has drunk from a grail filled with blood and has sated her thirst, for now… but is obvious she want more. She is not yet completely satisfied. She reminds me of a teenager who wants to experience everything in life and if possible right now!

There is a longing in her eyes to get off that rock, dive in her emotional waters and swim towards the light spot in the background. But she hesitates. Why? Perhaps she is scared, or maybe she enjoys the yearning more than the actual fulfilment of her dreams because when dreams come true they might not be as glamorous as we hoped they would be. Dreams are gossamer stories, while real life is often more heavy and solid and not always so easy to fantasize about.

Although fantasizing and dreaming of whatever makes us happy is perfectly okay, it feels to me that this card is warning us not to dwell in our dreamscapes for too long. This can make us dissatisfied with the life we have in the here and now.  Dreaming as a first stage of planting seeds and changing our life is much more rewarding than dreaming about a more exciting and fulfilling life in general. The first sets things in motion. The latter fills us with discontent and imprisons us.

So for today, I will be mindful of my dreams and fantasies: are they uplifting and focused on bringing about positive change or are they born out of discontent and frustration…

The Devil – Please wake me up!

Today’s card is Cernunnos, The Devil, from the Druidcraft Tarot. The two figures from The Lovers are in a deep sleep, probably dreaming of their sensual encounter in that card. 

Cernunnos, The God of the wild hunt and the underworld, is watching them, curious, if or when they will wake up. He is not evil or holding them captive against their will. He is just observing if those two can manage to embrace the material aspects of life without becoming addicted to them. As everything and always in life, this is a fine line to walk:  too much will often lead to addiction and obsession but too little can bring about disgust for everything physical. Both excesses are prone to cause a lot of damage to ourselves. The challenge of the card is to wake up and continue our journey even if that leads us to the next card: The Tower.

So who what energy can wake us up? The Queen of Wands, the good with of the deck. She has a pointy magic wand in her hand and when I look at those two naked bodies in the other card, it is not difficult to imagine what she will do with her wand…

Sometimes we need a bit of external encouragement when we can’t find it within ourselves. This could be a new project or hobby, a conversation with a friend or reading an inspiring book, as long as it sparks our inner fire and puts us on our feet again.

Today, for me, the Queen of Wands represents my excitement to join two IG challenges for the month of October: One about shadow work and the other one about connecting to the Feminine Divine. Will I finish them?  I don’t know, but I do love the thrill and the creative boost of starting these two challenges.

Seven of Cups - Fretting over first world problems

Today’s card is the Seven of Cups from the Druidcraft Tarot. This card represents being held captive by too many options and the inability to choose one and to get on with our lives. The guy is dressed in vibrant red and is sitting on a rock covered with soft green moss. He is staring at a vision of six beautiful cups, completely unaware of the real cup standing next to him. For me, this symbolizes the conflict between his more primal desires and that, what he truly loves. Often we want it all although deep down we know what makes us really happy and these two are most of the time not exactly the same. As long we have this inner conflict, we can keep sulking and lingering in the hope we can have it all. Yes, sometimes we can still act like our inner two-year-old, screaming for candy in a mall. 

The issues this card addresses are often first world problems. They hardly ever have anything to do with food. shelter, clothing etc. So what does this card trigger for me today? Since we are rapidly approaching October there are popping up several Shadow work challenges on IG. One even more promising than the other. Now you all know I am great at starting challenges but sadly not so good at finishing them. But none the less, I am tempted to join several of them. And the next issue is which decks to use? One or a few for each challenge or just pick them intuitively? Mind you, sticking with one deck for more than a few days is also quite challenging for me. Should I combine Oracle cards with Tarot and if so, which Oracle decks are suited for shadow work? Which journal should I use: a new one or just my regular tarot journal? These are only a few examples of what is keeping my mind occupied and also keeping me from making an actual decision, preparing myself,  and looking forward to the experience of doing this kind of challenge together with a part of the IG Community.

So for today, I am going to make up my mind about all of this and I will challenge myself to stick to my decision in order to clear my head and enjoy these last few days of September, instead of fretting over October challenges… J

The Devil – Babysteps towards freedom

Today’s card is The Devil from The Wild Unknown Tarot.  He is the personification of temptation and indulgence.  He is all about satisfying the primal needs of our ego. Numbing us and tempting us to distract our mind from whatever needs our attention is his number one goal. Of course, he is not some evil mythical creature. No, he is an undeniable part of who we are. 

It often feels like he wants to keep me from exploring my inner shadows; from dealing with my issues so I won’t grow and change. The Devil is not keen on change; he wants to keep everything the way it is now. Safety and comfort are his favorite disguises to keep us in bondage.

So what to do if we do want to change and move forward in life and I pulled the Ace of Pentacles. Immediately my eyes were drawn to the fiery parts in each card: The devils burning feet and the glowing center of the trunk. It feels as if we can redirect the energy we give to our inner Devil towards a new beginning, an opportunity to change however small it might be.

My main numbing strategy is screen time.  Not the time I am blogging or reading other people’s blogs, posting pictures on IG and enjoying other people’s posts. No, it is the mindless clicking, the checking en rechecking for updates or new emails. It is watching too many YouTube videos and last but definitely, not least it is binge-watching crime series. This habit consumes so much of my precious time and energy.

So starting from today I am going to finish the two knitting projects I have been neglecting lately. Hopefully, this will help me to find some inner peace and keep me more present and aware of what’s going on in the here and now.

New Moon in September

For this new moon, I have pulled one card from the Original Rider Waite Tarot as to what energy I should embrace during this next cycle of the Moon and I got the Six of Wands. This was quite surprising, because it is the exact same card as I pulled for the previous New Moon.

Honestly ,my good intentions to establish a free-flowing routine have  completely fallen by the wayside.  I became more and more reluctant towards building a daily routine. I just wanted to be free, to chose what I wanted to do and also when and where I wanted to do it. My whole life has been about maintaining a routine: School, work, raising children, and then work again. I realized that my freedom was more important to me than ticking of boxes from my to-do lists. The upside of this “failure” is that I now feel more in touch with myself than ever before. I have to check in regularly with myself  to discover what it is that I want and need at this very moment; what it is that will make me happy and content.

So over to the Six of wands for this lunation. I got the distinct feeling that even though I “failed” to accomplish my goal, I gained something very valuable too. But the six of wands is not a stagnant card. It urges me to move forward after recognizing and celebrating my victories. It is so easy to keep dwelling in a pleasant state of mind but life is also about  moving onward toward the next challenge (Seven of wands)

So for the coming lunation I will definitely be celebrating my new found sense of freedom but also focusing myself on how to become more and more the woman  I am supposed to be.   

Son of Pentacles – Try to love what you have to do

Today’s card is the Son of Pentacles from The Wild Unknown Tarot.

He is the most responsible Son of the deck: Doing his duty and sticking to the job until it’s finished.  Yes this is the Son you can depend on under all circumstances. He will never let you down. But what about him? Is he enjoying himself? Is he feeling proud of his accomplishments? Does his eyes lit up when he hears the compliments others might give him?

When you look at this card I suppose not. He is feeling rather down and depleted by his constant effort to do a good job. His heart isn’t in it anymore, so he is running on empty. Perhaps if he would allow himself to lie down and rest for a while, his muddled mind would clear up and he might realize that if you don’t do what you love then try to love what you do. In every job there will be things you dislike but being able to find what you do like, can make all the difference

Today I have to do some household chores: cleaning the toilet, mopping the floor, doing groceries… I think you’ll know what I aiming at …J

King of Cups – Caution: Risk Of Explosion

Today’s card is the King of Cups from The Raven's Prophecy Tarot. In this depiction we see a glass which  contains just one feather. The king of Cups is known to be a very good listener. He truly can hold space for how you feel deep down and for what you need to unburden. Only after you have told him everything, he will give you great advice on how to move forward without any pressure to see his way as the only way.

But who really knows what is going on with him:  Always smiling, always nodding , always  calm. Who knows what this feather is all about? He will not share, without being pushed quite a bit. His feelings are buried deep beneath his responsibility as king.  But beware, these build up emotions can explode unexpectedly and then he feels exposed, ashamed and crownless.

So what advice could we give this King and I got the Hanged Man: this card encourages him to take some time  to explore how he feels about being the archetypal counselor and perhaps even more importantly to explore how he feels….

Often taking a step back will give us a more clear perspective  on a lot of things; even on what we didn’t know troubled us in the first place.

I know all too well how it feels to be a King of Cups and when build up emotions become a hazard for my family and myself.

So for today will try to be more open about how I feel, if only to myself in my journal, in order to prevent my glass to break into pieces once again. And yes, taking a few good deep breaths or a time out after “King of Cups duty” is a very sound advice indeed! 

Temperance - From head to heart and back again

Today’s card is Temperance from the Tarot of the Hidden Realm. In this picture we see a young Fae woman pouring water from one cup into another and she is completely focused on her task. She is also very conscious of her body and her surroundings and her movements are as light and elegant as the dragonflies near her head.

It seems so easy when you look at this picture but the ease comes from lots of experience and practice. From being able to travel from her head to her heart and back again in a split second. Always checking in with herself has become totally natural for her. It allows her to blend her thoughts and feelings into a perfect mixture called living.

Finding this balance isn’t so hard for me but keeping it is much more challenging. I tend to forget consulting my heart when everything goes smoothly and I am in control. But when feelings come knocking unexpectedly, my structured life falls apart rather quickly and I have to pick up the pieces once again. I wonder why this happens over and over again. I mean, I am not daft, I get the message, but I don’t seem to be able to remember it when all is well again.

So for today I will travel this short distance regularly even though it might feel like a very long journey.

Two of Pentacles – Keep practicing

Today’s card is the Two of Pentacles from the Goddess Tarot. This is a card of balance, flexibility and a touch of playfulness. When we look at this woman, it is very obvious she doesn’t find this juggling act very difficult. She keeps her Pentacles in the air with grace and ease. She doesn’t even have to watch what she is doing. That is, in my opinion, the secret of a juggler. Once you get the hang of the rhythm of throwing and catching it isn’t that difficult anymore. Mind you, juggling isn’t so much about catching but more about throwing; about purposely letting go and trusting you will catch it again when the time is right.

Ah, if only I was such a proficient juggler. No need for planners or to-do lists, no need for creating some good habits day after day. I would love to be more like this woman who is living in this very moment and is satisfied with doing what she is can do. She isn’t concerned with all her other Pentacles laying around the house and catching dust.

So, for today I will try to focus on the task at hand without letting myself be distracted by everything else I should be doing instead.  Also, I will try to find some flow of throwing and catching, of breathing in and breathing out. 

Three Card Spread with The Goddess Tarot

Theme: Eight of Cups

With a waning moon and ebb tide, this card urges us to leave behind feelings and relationships which are no longer beneficial for us or perhaps they just have passed their expiration dates. It asks us to be true to ourselves and live an authentic life which is often not the easiest way to live.

Mentor: Tara – Beginnings

This card features the goddess Tara who has the power to grant all wishes and heal all sorrows. She is the perfect goddess to free us from mental blocks and help us to move forward in life. Notice how both the figures in the first two cards are looking over their shoulder and how Tara has no more reason to stay where she is now. The Cups are gone; no more regrets

Healer: King of Pentacles

Because most of the time life isn’t that easy, The king of Pentacles encourages us to enjoy the good things life has to offer us: coffee, sunshine, trees, chocolate, crystals…. So many things to cherish and to savor. And never forget time…there is always enough time to relax and take delight in what life has to offer us.

Three Card Spread – Keep checking in with yourself

For today I have decided to do the Within-Without-Advice spread with the Smith Waite Tarot. The cards I drew fit perfectly with my previous post about my attempt to create a “Free-Flowing routine” in order to establish some fulfilling and more healthy habits.

Within – Eight of Pentacles

It seems I feel quite content with the result of my new routine. Working with it brings structure in my life and a great deal of satisfaction. Gradually I will get better in maintaining my new and still fragile set of habits.

Without - The Chariot

Look at me I am riding on the wind. Just doing great. Oh no, not quite the movement I was expecting. Yes, this chariot has left the city behind the walls but now, in his concrete wagon he is going nowhere. It looks very impressive on the outside world but what is going on the inside of the charioteer?

Advice – The King of Cups

This is for me the archetype of the healer. He is our inner therapist, the part of ourselves that is able to distance himself of the problem at hand. He urges you  to find out what is really going on.

Yes it is obvious I am already trying too hard; becoming too rigid in my efforts although my intent was to stay compassionate with myself  and surrender to the flow of the day. This is so me: wanting to do my very best, even if it is not the best for myself. So I will take this advice at heart and I will proceed more slowly, more gently and more consciously about how I am feeling.

New Moon in August

For this new moon, I have pulled one card from the Fountain Tarot as to what energy I should embrace during this next cycle of the Moon and I got the Six of Wands: Another Six after last New Moon’s Six of Cups. Six in tarot is a very auspicious number; it is all about Union, Harmony, and balance. The Six of Wands speaks of hope and motivation and is a very timely card for me because as of late I am trying to build a free-flowing daily routine for myself to get things done and get a more healthy lifestyle. A free-flowing routine might sound like an oxymoron to you but it does work for me.  I’ve started with one habit I want to keep above all, which is meditating for 15 minutes before doing anything else and all the other things on my list were mere suggestions. Now I am also writing daily in my journal and drawing a tiny sketch a day. For me, the success rate of my “routine” is very motivating. I feel very accomplished by doing these three things which will cost me about 45 minutes a day. Only when I feel these three activities have become real habits, I will add one more. Also, I have promised myself that taking a step back when I feel overwhelmed has nothing to do with failure but is, in fact, a kind and compassionate thing to do.

The whole premise of this experiment is getting motivated by success and to take one baby step at the time. Every little success is a like golden star on my chart. And every little setback a pink heart of compassion.

Daughter of Air – fly boldly, fly freely

Today’s Card is Daughter of Air from the Vision Quest Tarot. In her hand, she is holding a feather. This feather is linking to her inner free flying eagle, who rises above her daily sometimes trivial problems to get a better view of the big picture and who will guide her into the right direction.

This card is all about self-liberation. To get out of our rut and turn into the freedom loving human being we are supposed to be. Staying where we are may seem the most secure and comforting thing to do but when we remind ourselves of our inner strength and innate power it isn’t strange we long for more. Remember we aren’t newly hatched chicks anymore;  we are full grown eagles ready to be bold and soar. 

"There is an eagle in me that wants to soar, and there is a hippopotamus in me that wants to wallow in the mud. Carl Sandburg

Queen of Clouds - Caged by Morality

Today’s card is the Queen of Clouds - Morality from the Osho Zen Tarot. Although the Queen of Swords is the queen I identify the most with, I sincerely hope this queen is nothing like me. Most likely she is a shadow aspect of me since I was raised, like many of my age, with lots of “do’s and don’t’s” and “should’s and shouldn’t’s”. I was supposed to know what was expected of me and if I failed to live up to these expectations, I knew I had disappointed my parents, which would hurt just as much as being sent to my room. Because of the fear of making a mistake, I build a protective cage of false security around myself and lived my life as obedient as I could. Within that cage, judgments about others grew rampantly and left me isolated within myself. Luckily cages can be broken or torn down, often by major life changing events and many years ago I experienced the freedom of The Knight of Water (jumper card). The world was so much bigger and more diverse than I ever could have imagined.

To mature from black and white morality to a multitude of colorful ideas and options about life demands a large recalibration of the mind and even sometimes a hard restart. Yes, it hurt but it was so worth the darkness, the pain and the tears. 

Spreading your wings for the first is scary but when the inner fluttering becomes too strong you finally understand your cage is not your home anymore.

Othala and Intuition – Your gut feeling will lead you home

Today’s rune is Othala, the last rune of the Futhark, the end of your journey. It is the rune of heritage, inner wealth, coming home and finding your purpose, your destiny,.

So I wondered what energy I could consider to be my guide, my road sign, towards my purpose in live. Maybe I would even pull a card which would reveal my purpose in life…..

So I stood before my shelf with most of my decks, wondering which deck would be the one to answer my question and I picked The dreams of Gaia Tarot. After some extensive shuffling I pulled “Intuition”. Maybe not a representation of my life’s purpose but definitely a gentle guide towards it. Listening to my intuition will keep me on the right track for sure.

Our intuition is the voice beneath all reason. The undercurrent of our conscious mind. It is the voice which words our deeper knowledge. Of course feelings, inklings, gentle nudges and pulls are also ways of our intuition to communicate with us. For me intuition is not only the voice of our unconscious but also of our higher consciousness or maybe even of our divine spark or God herself.

More than often we tend to downplay synchronistic events  and coincidences. How much more magical our life would be, if we would see them as little miracles. Maybe this way we would me more keen to heed our intuition, so we would practice and strengthen this innate quality. This way our signposts to guide us where we are supposed to be would be written in neon lights instead of being hidden in the shadows of our mind.