Oil pastel of Brigid

This year I wanted to celebrate Imbolc by making an oil pastel painting of Brigid, a Celtic fire goddess of poetry, smithcraft and healing. 

Brigid is also sometimes called Mary of Eire. The similarities between Brigid and Mary has been the cause of my renewed interest in her. Both are benevolent protective aspects of the Divine Feminine. Especially Brigid’s aspect of Hearth goddess and her inspirational creative fire are both very appealing to me.

After some more study I’ve discovered that that Brigid was also revered in the southern parts of The Netherlands. Just a few kilometers from my home town, in a small village there is a St. Brigida church with a statue of Saint Brigid. They also have St. Brigida school and a St. Brigida street  You can imagine I’m going to visit that village any time soon now.

By sharing this painting with you I want to wish you all a blessed Imbolc or St Brigid’s day.

Hugs Ellen

Three of Swords - Ignoring the wisdom of my heart

Today’s cards are the Three of Swords and the Prince of Swords from the Goddess Tarot by Kris Waldherr.

For me the Three of Swords is all about making decisions which go straight against the heart, often without being actually aware it until our heart feels more like a pincushion than like a place where love springs from.

Hurting our Heart, undermining our Self Love, is a habit which we don’t shake off easily. Often it is advisable to start with baby steps. Be mindful if someone or some situation is asking or expecting something from you. Don’t react instantly but take a breath or two and feel. Try to find out what it is that you want, what makes your heart sing and then respond in a confident but friendly way. Even if you decide to go against your own wishes, this way you will know and maybe you can think of something to remove the sword afterwards: a bath, a cup of tea etc.

What energy will help me to brace myself against the expectations of the world: the Prince of Swords. He is a young but already strong-willed and very articulate. There will be no confusion about what he wants and why. Notice how his neck collar is protecting his heart and how he holds his swords near this very vulnerable but precious part of himself.

He will teach me to stand up for myself and be clear about my need and wants not only to others but more so to myself. 

Oil Pastel Painting: “full Moon Song”

It's quite obvious, I can’t get enough of my oil pastels. For this painting I’ve used some photo’s which I’ve found online for reference, to be able to draw the wolf and the woman in the right pose. The whole painting is made with shades of grey and blue in order to create a nighttime feel.  So far it has been a great oil pastel adventure…

Two of Swords – Listen to your heart

Today’s card is the Two of Swords from the Anna K Tarot. Instead of the usual blindfolded woman the man in the depiction is walking away from his swords. Maybe he is hoping when he pretends they are not there he doesn’t have to deal with them. But it is obvious this isn’t working: the sand from the beach outside has found its way into the room, the floor is cracking, the waves high and from the anxious look on his face I am sure he knows. It is a new moon, the perfect time for new beginnings and facing his responsibilities 

Often when we try to make up our mind with only our intellect our decision doesn’t feel quite right. A little voice starts nagging us. Although we have decided, we are still doubting if we did the right thing. Only when head and heart are both being heard a balanced decision can be made and the man in Two of Swords  can go home to the Ten of Pentacles, where he can enjoy the simple things of life with his family. There he will experience a peace of mind which he thought he had lost in the tidal waves of the stormy sea.

Where do we go from here?

It freezing cold outside and this frosty weather is a perfect representation of how I feel lately. As you all know S is moving out and is very busy in her new house. The actual move is scheduled in about two weeks and that leaves me in a kind of stasis: a “before and after the move” way of thinking. 

The two cards I’ve drawn for today from the Original Rider Waite Tarot, depict the upcoming changes in our lives very well: The Page of Wands is eager to try out new things. He isn’t quite clear about the how and the why but he does know he wants something new and exciting. The Chariot tells us to find our way into the world, follow our dreams and pursuit our goals. It speaks about living authentically and finding our purpose in life. Fortunately this cards holds the promise of success.

The three of us are on the threshold of a new phase in our lives. S is moving out and M and I are about to find  a new way of living together. Also we have to learn  to live without each other. Not to see and talk to one and other on daily basis. It will probably take some time to get used to all of these changes.  

But for now it is still freezing  outside and everything stays the same for a little while longer

Eight of wands – Wake me up inside

Today’s card is the Eight of Wands from the Mary El Tarot. We see a winged red lion carrying a sleeping child under a starry arch of Nut, the Egyptian goddess of the night sky. The lion holds in his paw and hand a rainbow lemniscate, the symbol of eternity.

It might appear that God is carrying you here, that you are watched over by divinity, but in truth it is you, the wisest most courageous part of yourself who is carrying you.

This card is a wake-up call to your sleeping self.  The part that thinks she is alone, separated, inadequate, not worthy and so on. All of us have a greatness inside ourselves which yearns to be embraced, if we only would wake up and see how strong and wonderful we really are. The best way to “wake up” is to relax and to listen to our inner voice, which will inspire us to create with colors, movement, words and music. There in the beauty and splendor of art we will begin to get a feel of our true potential

“You were born with potential. 

You were born with goodness and trust. 

You were born with ideals and dreams. 

You were born with greatness. 

You were born with wings. 

You are not meant for crawling, so don't. 

You have wings. 

Learn to use them and fly.”

Rumi

New moon in January

This month I have used the Mary El Tarot for my New Moon tarot spread.  I have been working with this deck for a few days now and my intention is to pull one card each day and set those cards apart from my deck. That way in 78 days I will have worked through the entire deck. I hope it will strengthen my relationship with this intriguing but very complex deck. For this spread I will pull two cards: The first one for the energy I am going to release and the second one for the energy which is beneficial for me to embrace:

Release – Seven of Cups

With this card we are presented with a black wolf, our animal self, our fears and deepest desires. Normally it would advise us to step of the well worn path and enter the forest to meet our wolf. But in the Release position it tells me not to walk to deep in that forest for I might get truly lost. This is not the time to dig deep for the roots of my fear and anxiety.  I see this  a warning not to stir the smooth surface of my subconscious, so that I won’t get overwhelmed by what lies beneath.

Embrace –  King of Swords

This card is quite the contrary of the previous one. The king of Swords wants me to control my thoughts, master my mind and focus on what I want to manifest this month. Only after scanning this card I noticed there are words written alongside his quills which are the swords he uses to rule his realm. The written word is a powerful tool to keep our mind focused and our intention clear.

As you all know my eldest daughter S and my SIL are living with me for a few weeks now and they plan to move out in about three weeks. So a lot of our conversations and activities are gathered around this pending move. Since it is not my move but theirs I have to allow them to make the necessary decisions about Everything! And that’s not easy….

So instead of worrying and trying not to smother them with well meant advise, I will write write and write, first to clear my mind from obsessive moving thoughts and then to focus on how to make more room for myself: for reading cards, reading books, listening to music and painting in my art journal…

Ten of Wands: Feeling confident instead of overburdened

Today’s card is the Ten of Wands from the Mary El Tarot. Instead of a figure weighed down by ten wands here we see a rider on his white horse with a bow in his hand. He is robed in fiery orange and is radiating confidence and inner strength.

The rider has reached the end of the cycle of wands. He is the victorious hero wearing his wreath proudly. But don’t be mistaken his victory isn’t due to the fact  that  he has been successful all the time. No it is because he has accepted each challenge presented to him. Failing is as much part of this cycle as winning and they are both part of the fabric of life. It is not so much whether you win or lose but more about how you conduct yourself  in the process. 

Do you rise above the petty ups and downs of life or are you struck down by each obstacle found on your way. This rider rides his horse high up in the clouds looking at his life in a birds view and he only notices its grand design instead of the tiny frays here and there. The Ten of Wands in this deck urges us to connect our to inner strength, our stronghold deep within us, where we learn what really matters and where true hero’s are born.

Oil pastel drawing: “Everlasting love”

Yesterday I’ve made a drawing of a Mother with Child with beeswax crayons and oil pastels. I was thinking about what I could draw when the image of a lemniscate came to mind: the symbol of infinity.  Immediately I connected it with a mother figure ; a head and a womb. Then I started to draw…..

What Matters Within Spread.

A few days ago I came across the What Matters Within spread on IG by @violetauraphoto

Originally this is a tarot spread but like most spreads, the type of cards you want to use is entirely up to you. After having taken a very long break from my Lenormand cards I decided to use my all-time favorite Lenormand deck: the Celtic Lenormand by Chloe McCracken and Will Worthington. For each position I picked two cards instead of one because Lenormand is generally read in pairs.

The positions are the following:

1 What’s behind me (taken from the bottom of the deck) man + woman.

Ouch, where is this going? This represent the loving and equal relationship I had; both of us working for our family; making a home for us; a safe haven. Notice these two cards actually create a house in the middle. Like these figures are two part of one painting, we were like two peas in pod 

2 What’s before me (taken from the top of the deck) stars + house

Following  my destiny, seeking guidance on how to rebuild my home again on all levels: spiritual emotional and physical, having a clear perception on how make the new foundation strong and reliable and maybe wish upon that star

3 What’s within me (taken from somewhere in the deck) anchor and burial mound

One of my words for this year is Letting Go. I feel this pair urges me to finally let go of that false outdated  sense of security and that it is time to acknowledge at heart level that I can and have to make it on my own. If I am able to do so, I will be more inclined to let Spirit guide me and confidently set sail to new shores

My words for 2016

This  year I’ve had some difficulty choosing my word for the year. Previous years my word had always come naturally to me; distinguished itself gradually from  other options but this time around I couldn’t make up my mind and was left with three words, equally appealing to me. So I made a daring decision: This year is my year, so why not have three words.  I am free to do whatever I with my word of the year so without further ado here they are:

(Drumroll………………………)

Osho Zen Tarot

Attention

This year I want to try to really pay attention to the present moment instead of wasting it to worries and regrets.  The present moment is all we really have so I want to make the most of it

Letting go

Letting go fear and control will encourage me to embrace what is here and now and to step in each moment with an open mind.

Trust

I want to trust that  everything I experience  in my life will bring me more understanding of who I am and will help me to become who I am supposed to be and most importantly that everything will be okay

Last but not least, my motto for this year is:

Everything will be okay, so let go and let God(des)

Do you have a word or motto for the coming year?

Mary did you know?

Today I wanted to share with you my first attempt to paint with oil pastels. I was pleasantly surprised by the versatility of this medium. I suppose the subject of my painting doesn’t come as a surprise to you, because lately Mother Mary appears on every drawing or painting I create. I find it so easy to relate to her and in doing so to relate to the Divine Feminine again.

This particular painting is inspired by the song “Mary did you know"

This song tells us about how little Mary knew up front about the future of her baby. In the song the importance of his life is highlighted but it also got me thinking about the hardships she had to endure being his mother. I can't help but wonder...if she would have known, would she have said; “Behold the servant of the Lord”

And that brings me back to my own life:  if I would have known the sorrow and the pain, the struggles and the challenges I would have to endure in this life, would I chose for this life again, say yes to the complete package? 

Truthfully? Yes, yes and thrice yes! Simple because I couldn’t bear to miss out on the love I receive on daily base from my beautiful family!

Wishing you a wonderful New Year filled with Love and Happiness!