Monday, July 14, 2014

Ten of Swords - Sometimes I get so angry.

Tarot of the Hidden Realm Julia Jeffrey, Ten of Swords
"This has to end! This has to stop right now!" The screams of the Morrigan  resound in my mind when I look at this Ten of Swords from the Tarot of the Hidden Realm. I can so relate to this feeling of inner rage. Always being kind, nice, friendly and polite does that to a person. 
A few days ago I had a serious fight with M (we 're all good now J) It did release a lot of stress and just half hour after this outburst we were able to communicate and sort out our differences in good harmony.
Yesterday I had visited my husband and as usual that caused me some anxiety and stress.That's why I had planned to do something relaxing for myself afterwards. Only a "friend" called me the minute after I came home, again  with some self-inflicted problem, which blew my fuses.  I kept calm and friendly but after our conversation., I had to free one single scream of deep felt irritation. On slash of this sword and there was silence in my mind and a sigh of relief. This Ten of Swords is a culmination of terror and anger and at the same time the end of it all. So for me it was a most welcome card to explore 

Affirmation: Today I am going to speak my mind instead of fueling my rage.

I was raised in a family where none of us ever raised a voice, so there was no room to express feelings of rage or even unabashed joy - a little bashed joy, here or there, or being mildly disgruntled.” Anne Lamott

8 comments:

  1. This is one area where we are different; my first stepdad never allowed any emotions that hinted at any kind of weakness. Rage and anger were acceptable. So you'd think that all those other feelings, like sadness and fear, would've gotten worked out. But just like you can repress anger, that other stuff can get repressed too. It took me years to peel off most of the layers to see what the real emotions I was experiencing actually were. BUT it is nice that you were able to release what you were feeling in a way that didn't hurt anyone and made you feel better!

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    1. Most of the time rage and anger are covering up our deeper emotions. That's why I think it is best to speak your mind in a civilized way so feelings aren't buried beneath bottled up irritations and anger.
      I guess we all have to deal with with the consequences of our upbringing. Some more than the other of course.
      Big Hug

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  2. Good luck with that. I have learned to stand on the throat of my temper, but once it gets away from me,.. I don't even know who that person is. I expect we all struggle with a middle ground between incinerating the person in front of us and choking on the what we didn't say.

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    1. Yes I see what you mean. My ugly quarrel with M scared us both. That is the most scary part of rage: the unleashing of the uncontrolled animal side of us

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  3. Great commentary here!

    I had a bad-bobbin-day yesterday and could easily have gone at the sewing machine with a sword like that, lol.

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    1. Ha ha I bet your words were just as ferocious :D

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  4. I like how you relate the 10 of Swords to anger - expressing it so that you can find harmony again! This card certainly does look angry. I have this deck, maybe I will pull it out later today and draw some cards - it's not one of my "regulars" but I like the art! I hope you are well!

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    1. Hi Olivia good to hear from you again. It is not a regular reading deck for me too but gradually I am starting to connect with it more and more.
      Yes we are just fine here. I am hopping over to read your post now :)
      Hugs

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