My best Christmas gifts!

I wasn’t planning on blogging today but when I read Chloe’s post: “What Were Your Best ChristmasGifts?”

I was inspired to pull two cards to answer the following questions for myself. I used the Druidcraft Tarot since it is my “Christmas deck” for this year. I have been enjoying it so much; just looking at the pictures, discovering new details, pulling a card now and then and being amazed by its wisdom and evocative nature all over again.

So let’s dive in:

What is the best gift I gave this Christmas? – Ace of Swords

From the depth of my sometime murky unconscious  emerged one thought crystal clear: this Christmas is a brand new experience: a once in a life time Christmas. No need to stain it with regrets and/or high expectations of Christmases  past. This relaxed mindset allowed me to step into this year’s Christmas with my family and really enjoy it. My eldest daughter and her boyfriend and my husband all came to visit us and we had a very good and peaceful day. I was able to divide my energy with ease and even keep some for  myself.

What is the best gift I received this Christmas? – Three of Swords

All  the merriment and cheerfulness were like a healing balm for the lingering sadness which is always, one way or another, asking for attention during this season. But this year I felt no need to harden my heart so I could protect myself from feeling too much. No this year I felt like I could be truly be myself and that was a wonderful Christmas gift.

What were your gifts this year?

Three of Swords - Ignoring the wisdom of my heart

Today’s cards are the Three of Swords and the Prince of Swords from the Goddess Tarot by Kris Waldherr.

For me the Three of Swords is all about making decisions which go straight against the heart, often without being actually aware it until our heart feels more like a pincushion than like a place where love springs from.

Hurting our Heart, undermining our Self Love, is a habit which we don’t shake off easily. Often it is advisable to start with baby steps. Be mindful if someone or some situation is asking or expecting something from you. Don’t react instantly but take a breath or two and feel. Try to find out what it is that you want, what makes your heart sing and then respond in a confident but friendly way. Even if you decide to go against your own wishes, this way you will know and maybe you can think of something to remove the sword afterwards: a bath, a cup of tea etc.

What energy will help me to brace myself against the expectations of the world: the Prince of Swords. He is a young but already strong-willed and very articulate. There will be no confusion about what he wants and why. Notice how his neck collar is protecting his heart and how he holds his swords near this very vulnerable but precious part of himself.

He will teach me to stand up for myself and be clear about my need and wants not only to others but more so to myself. 

Three card spread with the Anna K Tarot – Keep smiling

What a downhearted, sorrow full  bunch of cards this is.  I've pulled them from my Anna K tarot without any specific question. The Nine of Rods was my first card and it set the theme for this spread. This card is all about taking the time to regroup yourself after some serious battles. The man is obviously hurt, dead tired and on guard for the next attack.

I can relate to this card since we have a lot of things to work out around new social security rules for M and what the officials expect from her and if she able to meet those expectations. Since this isn't the first and certainly won't be the last time we have to deal with this kind of trouble, we are a bit inclined to expect the worst. So I asked the cards if there was a better way to approach such a situation and I got The Emperor and the Three of Swords.

At first glance it seemed like a dreary set of cards filled with grumpy characters and sadness and lots of greyish colors. But when I looked closer I could see some sound advise here. The Emperor will guide us through the maze of rules and regulations. He urges us to learn about them so we will be sufficiently prepared once we have to meet with the officials. Also he advises us to detach ourselves emotionally which is highlighted by the Three of Swords. There is no reason to get all sad and broken hearted yet. Most likely the officials aren't; set out to hurt us and we don’t always have to be prepared for the worst case scenario. Maybe everything will work out fine just as usual. 

So although these cards look all sad and grey I am very pleased with them today and they’ve put a smile on my face

Dreamer Three - Soul Loss

Well to be honest, I didn't expect to get this card after yesterday’s Dreamer Ten. But today we've got Dreamer Three (the Three of Swords) from the Tarot of the Sidhe. We see a Sidhe woman with her heart ripped out. It is torn apart and eaten by three black ravens. The three trees which are rooted in her skirt are bare. With her hair she is connected to the blood red clouds and behind her a large sun is rising behind the mountains. She is fully merged with her surroundings yet she is heart - and soulless.

Every time when I get this card I wonder: What is eating away my soul? Which grief and/or pain have I not fully embraced yet?

So often grief and sadness are cloaked in anger, fear, guilt or regret. Those feelings can fester deep and feed off  your joy and energy. Only when we can dig deeper, beyond the surface and dare to feel the pain, we can heal and move on. It can be a scary and lonely road because when one pain is discovered a lot of the others might wake up too and  this can be a very overwhelming experience. So it is good to know the morning sun will always lead you home again. The relief and the related relaxation will make it so worth your while to embark on this journey.

“The heart of Dream is torn in three

Leaving a hole where the whole should be

The blessed ravens feast on sorrow

That the light may bring a fairer morrow”

(Emily Carding)

Dreamer Three – Be gentle with yourself

Nobody likes to get a card like this: Dreamer Three (the Three of Swords) from the Tarot of the Sidhe. We see a Sidhe woman with her heart ripped out. It is torn apart and eaten by three black ravens. The three trees which are rooted in her skirt are bare. With her hair she is connected to the blood red clouds and behind her a large sun is rising behind the mountains. She is fully merged with her surroundings yet she is heart - and soulless.

“The heart of Dream is torn in three

Leaving a hole where the whole should be

The blessed ravens feast on sorrow

That the light may bring a fairer morrow”

How many of us are living like this. Going through the motion of our daily lives and not being aware  of how we feel and if we are living the life we want. Is our heart still in it, or is it torn out and crushed by unresolved grief and heart break. So often we don’t take the time to acknowledge our pain and we think when we act as always, eventually it will go away. But believe me it won’t. It will strike back even harder just as long until you feel the hole inside you.  The positive side of this card is when you do connect with your pain you will heal. Your heart will become more resilient and at the same time more compassionate, tender and loving. “Be gentle with yourself and only go as fast as the slowest part of you feels safe to go”. After you've healed your heart and soul, you can dream again about what you want out of life, because with a heartfelt dream all options are open to us again

Lyrics:Gentle With Myself

By Karen Drucker

I will be gentle with myself.

I will be gentle with myself.

And I will hold myself like a newborn baby child.

- repeat…

I will be tender with my heart.

I will be tender with my heart.

And I will hold my heart like a newborn baby child.

- repeat

And I will only go as fast as the slowest part of me feels safe to go.

I will only go as fast as the slowest part of me feels safe to go.

I will be easy on myself.

I will be easy on myself.

And I’ll love myself like a newborn baby child.

- repeat

And I will only go as fast as the slowest part of me feels safe to go.

- repeat

Now, I know…

I am gentle with myself.

I am gentle with myself.

And I hold myself like a newborn baby child.

- repeat…

And I rock myself like a newborn baby child.

I hold myself like a newborn baby child.

I love myself like a newborn baby child.

Three of swords: take care of your heart

Morgan Greer Tarot

This  daily draw from the Morgan Greer Tarot is at first glance not such a happy card to get, but it might be not so bad as it seems.

First of all the depiction is gorgeous. Just a simple heart with three swords pierced through it, but how vivid it gets because of the colors and the hatched shading.

Now let’s take a look at the meaning. Usually the Three of Swords is connected to heartbreak, grief and utter sadness and when you use the card for prediction that can be rather frightening. But what if we instead think of the lesson to be learned, the direction to be taken, when we draw this card?

For me the Three of Swords is all about a disconnection between heart and mind. It is not so much about how others hurt us to our core, but how we let them hurt us, because we are so vulnerable and insecure at heart level. And perhaps even worse; what do you think of our own swords we clash on a daily base into our hearts. Everybody has some negative self talk that can make our heart bleed. We are often too afraid of the  feelings our heart wants to express. Ever so quickly we stab it and try do act if nothing has happened; if nothing is wrong. So instead of pointing our finger at others perhaps it is time to get some emotional bandage and patch up our own hearts.

Isn't the beginning of spring not a lovely time to begin to allow ourselves to feel without being cut off by (ir)rational reasons? 

A tarot spread for the New Year

Yesterday I've stumbled upon a great spread for the new year. It was created by Kate from Daily TarotGirl and she has made a video about it too.  It’s not a twelve month spread but more an overall view for the coming year. I liked it so much, I've done this reading for my daughters as well as for myself. We were all amazed about the accuracy of the readings. Whether it was the spread, the deck or our own awesomeness, It was a great experience to do this together.J

I've used the Druidcraft Tarot (just as Kate did) because I am very fond of this deck and I tend to use it for larger spreads. Now that I've trimmed the borders the colors of all the cards together are so beautiful 

Druidcraft Tarot

1 The overall message of the reading:  - The Lovers

For me this is a card of feeling whole. A synergy of male and female; mind and heart. This card also urges me to really, fully connect to the things I want to accomplish and to go for it; to be passionate about it.

2 Your goals and dreams for 2014 and how do you make things happen? - Nine of Swords.
I want to let go of my anxiety and worries and to learn to trust in myself and in the future. No more long negative spiraling into the black hole!

3 What actions are needed to be successful?- Three of Swords.

I still have to process parts of my grief, pain and sadness to be able to move forward

4 What do you leave behind in 2013? -  Four of Swords.

I've been resting long enough! Now it’s time to pick myself up and make things happen

5 The theme of 2014 : -Two of Wands.

I was indecisive and insecure. I knew my current situation was solid and save. But I felt like there had to be more, only I was too afraid to make the next move.  Now is the time to step over the threshold and make a the first step

6 Where  will 2014 lead us? -  Three of Pentacles.

YAY! My creativity card. I am starting to feel more relaxed already when I am drawing and I want to improve that by drawing (or painting , writing, collage etc) more often and to really be thankful and happy with the things I will create in 2014

7 Obstacles for 2014: - Five of Cups.

I have to be careful not to be overwhelmed by feeling sorry for myself when I am feeling sad or anxious. It’s better to focus on what is still there than on what I've lost

8 Gifts and talents for 2014: -  Ace of Swords.

 I am developing a new, more positive way of thinking. My gifts are my mind, my words, my writing; Those are the gifts I can use to find clarity, new idea’s and insights.

9 Message from your guides before you step into the new year: -  The world.

Wow! What a beautiful message: “You are already whole: You are who you are supposed to be at this very moment. Everything is okay. Just take the next step and your path will unfold itself into the new year.”

I wish everybody to be able to take that next step into 2014

Happy New Year! 

Is there life after death?

October 29: The falling leaves remind us of death and the afterlife. Does the soul keep on living after death and where does it go?

Crystal Visions Tarot

Answering this question is not that easy. Nobody really knows if there’s life after death. People believe, hope and doubt on this issue. Each of us has his own perception of this presumed afterlife. And just as with so many questions this one is raising even more questions than giving  answers.

Let’s have a look if the three of swords can shed some light over this issue. Usually this card represents heartbreak , loss, separation, grief, decisions against the heart etc. But the combination of this question and the three of swords of the Crystal Visions Tarot will hopefully  help me to answer this question. So let’s bend the common interpretation of this card a bit. The woman is stabbed in her heart with three swords. It is surely lethal.  She is standing near a grave. Perhaps her own. Roses are growing on the grave and three ravens fly away high in the air. I assume that if one dies., the body is buried and the spirit and the soul will keep on living.  At first the soul will have to adjust in spirit form. Perhaps there is sadness and grief to leave the loved ones behind. But eventually the soul with fly free leaving the physical world behind. I think the spirit (what’s  in a name) is more an ethereal body of the soul. When the soul “crosses over” there will be less need for such a body. Where the soul will go I don’t know and honestly, I don’t care that much. I believe in eternal life in whatever form whether it be as angels or as pure energy, we will know when we get there. 

Well, I didn’t expect this at all. This answer is slightly different from my former assumption about the afterlife, but I like this one better I think.  Just two more days to go with these questions. I’d never thought I would make it. J