Nine of Cups –Sharing our gratitude

Today’s card is the Nine of Cups from the Druidcraft Tarot. This card is my theme card for this year. We see a man sitting at his table with his cup raised. He is content and has done well for himself. But especially in this depiction, it feels like something is missing. He has laid the table for his guests to drink some of his exquisite wine and eat from a fresh cooked salmon. Yet, nobody else is there. Perhaps it is still too early; otherwise, he wouldn’t be smiling and sitting there all pleased and feeling good about himself.

This is the card of dreams come true, wishes fulfilled and all things good in life. It invites us to ponder about what we have filled our nine cups with and what wisdom we have gained (salmon) There so much to be grateful for and to be proud of. This harvest season is particularly suited to express our gratitude for everything life has offered us. And yes I do mean everything because often our challenges are carrying our most precious gifts.

So for today, I will ponder on the content of my nine cups and especially about what this beautiful salmon has taught me in the last few months. But... I will also share my findings with my loved ones and then I will be stepping from the solitude of the Nine of Cups into the warm embrace of the Ten of Cups...

Seven of Cups - Fretting over first world problems

Today’s card is the Seven of Cups from the Druidcraft Tarot. This card represents being held captive by too many options and the inability to choose one and to get on with our lives. The guy is dressed in vibrant red and is sitting on a rock covered with soft green moss. He is staring at a vision of six beautiful cups, completely unaware of the real cup standing next to him. For me, this symbolizes the conflict between his more primal desires and that, what he truly loves. Often we want it all although deep down we know what makes us really happy and these two are most of the time not exactly the same. As long we have this inner conflict, we can keep sulking and lingering in the hope we can have it all. Yes, sometimes we can still act like our inner two-year-old, screaming for candy in a mall. 

The issues this card addresses are often first world problems. They hardly ever have anything to do with food. shelter, clothing etc. So what does this card trigger for me today? Since we are rapidly approaching October there are popping up several Shadow work challenges on IG. One even more promising than the other. Now you all know I am great at starting challenges but sadly not so good at finishing them. But none the less, I am tempted to join several of them. And the next issue is which decks to use? One or a few for each challenge or just pick them intuitively? Mind you, sticking with one deck for more than a few days is also quite challenging for me. Should I combine Oracle cards with Tarot and if so, which Oracle decks are suited for shadow work? Which journal should I use: a new one or just my regular tarot journal? These are only a few examples of what is keeping my mind occupied and also keeping me from making an actual decision, preparing myself,  and looking forward to the experience of doing this kind of challenge together with a part of the IG Community.

So for today, I am going to make up my mind about all of this and I will challenge myself to stick to my decision in order to clear my head and enjoy these last few days of September, instead of fretting over October challenges… J

Eight of Arrows – Keep Going

Today’s card is the Eight of Arrows (aka the Eight of Swords) from the Wildwood Tarot.  We see a young woman struggling on her journey. Eight broken arrows are lying in the snow. They are of no use to her anymore.  Although her path is challenging, cold and lonely, she keeps going and she doesn’t give up. Her staff and her lantern are symbols of hope and determination. I prefer this depiction over the Rider-Waite version where the woman is blindfolded and not able to leave the imprisonment of her own thoughts.

No, this young woman is painfully aware of the brokenness of her arrows and how she has to rephrase her view of life, her feelings and ideas, her story. Often this is a lonely road to travel. Of course, we can ask for advice but the actual task, the decision to move forward,  is ours. This is, in my opinion, an act of great courage. 

This week we had a family get together to celebrate our wedding anniversary. This day is always filled with many contra dictionary feelings which leave me a bit shattered and down. Outdated expectations and missed opportunities are almost certain to come up on days like this. But although I am not feeling at my best. I do know it is best for me to keep going and to keep busy.

Seven of Swords - Putting it all together

After yesterday’s card, the Seven of Swords seems to invite us to really take a good look at what we believe to be true and to shed some light over contradicting idea’s. This card invites me to write about my spiritual beliefs and how I came to this personal blend of several belief systems.

As you all know I was raised Christian but never felt quite comfortable with the exclusive nature of Christianity. Although I loved God and Jesus, the dogma’s were putting me off immensely.  So starting in adolescence,  I have always been trying to fit in with other kinds of spiritual groups but up until today I have never found one. Buddhism, Wicca, Paganism, they all have beautiful and deep truths but somehow I missed the God of my Childhood and, honestly, there was always the fear of being totally wrong and the impending consequences.

My altar was a beautiful representation of my confusion and my swaying between different beliefs. One day I would have representations of Mary, Jesus and other Christian symbols on my altar but a month later it could have changed into a celebration of nature and the Divine Feminine. When I was totally confused I reduced it to a few crystals and a large white candle.

Then I picked up “Paganism” by River and Joyce Higginbotham which taught me that our idea’s of Divinity are something entirely different then Divinity itself. Words, ideas etc are only limiting our perception of God.

This helped me to overcome the fear to be wrong and after long deliberation, I took a leap of faith and I wholeheartedly embraced God as truly multifaceted. It was such a relief not having to puzzle the pieces together but experiencing how everything blends in seamlessly: my love for Jesus and Mary are in no way contradicting with my reverence for Mother Holda and the  Great Mother. One thing that l really love is that with Jesus, I have a male aspect of God to relate to which was very difficult for me when I was solely focusing on Paganism.

In this card we see the old man desperately trying to fit his seven swords in a structure he can work with. I am now positive he will succeed but only when he is willing to implement some room for mystery and awe because our spirit can take us places where our mind cannot enter.

Six of Swords - Mind Traveling

Today’s card is the Six of Swords from the Druidcraft Tarot. Two persons are sitting in a little boat: a young woman, a man. The boatman is guiding his boat of the river. I wonder where it is they are going to. They do have still some issues to resolve because they have brought their Swords with them. Where ever you go, you cannot outrun your problems but you can put them aside for a while so you can find some peace of mind and crossing the river in a boat will prevent you from drowning in your worries or get too tangled up in them.

Nowadays for me, there is no place like home, so I don’t see myself traveling in the real world anytime soon. But I do like travel in my mind: reading books, watching movies, fantasize or just wandering my mind and see where this will lead me. There is so much to discover in the boundless world of our imagination. The only thing we need is a cozy spot and the willingness to be taken on a journey by your inner ferryman.

Page of Bows – Stoat: Jump!

Today’s card is the Page of Bows –Stoat from the Wildwood tarot. A perfect card to lift up my spirit after yesterday’s post. This card is the equivalent of the Page of Wands from the RWS deck. Its youthful playful energy includes a.o: creativity, willfulness, impulsiveness and curiosity and since this animal is a predator, I would like to add fierceness as well.

Look at him standing on his rock, one paw lifted, ears pricked up, and the point of his tail is slightly curved. His whole demeanor radiates excitement before action. Maybe that's what this Page is all about for today:  To find something which excites me, makes me curious and then jump in fearlessly. Just do it and make the best of it. I can’t imagine a stoat refusing to jump of his rock because he is afraid to hurt his paw. He just jumps because he know he has to and he deals with the consequences in the next moment. No, I don’t suggest we should live recklessly but a little less planning and thinking ahead might result in a lot more fun and enjoyment. The fear of making mistakes is more than often depriving us of joyful living

So for today I say to myself: let’s jump of that rock and finish my latest art journal page. Whether or not I am content with the final result, I am sure I will enjoy myself a lot while playing with my art supplies! 

New Moon in February

For this new moon I’ve pulled  one card from the Wildwood Tarot as to what  energy  I should embrace  during the time until the Full Moon in March. I got the Seven of Vessels – Mourning. Perhaps you can imagine my initial reaction to this card. My first thoughts were: how could this be a focal point right now, when I am so trying to find some emotional balance again? But then I knew: We are often talking about releasing and letting go to make room for the new but we tend to forget the work we have to do prior of letting go. Mourning is hard work and calls for a great deal of effort and endurance. It is only through mourning we can become soft and fluid again because when we hold on to grief, often without knowing, we tighten, both mentally and physically. We hold on to our sadness, our loss, in our stomach, our muscles and we bury it deep in the shadow of our soul. This way it can fester and eventually make us depressed. We can’t escape mourning so we’d better get to it.

Usually we are better at mourning our greater losses, the ones we can’t hide away: the death of loved ones, losing a great love etc. We often mourn these losses in the circle of our family and friends. But this card also encourage us to look at the smaller losses, the seemingly insignificant ones.

What immediately came to mind, when I saw this card is how I never have acknowledged my sadness over the loss of my ability to play the piano. I have had piano lessons for more than seven years and it gave me such joy to play this instrument. But due to my nerve damage in my hand I won’t  be able play again. It hurts too much.  Just as we have to be grateful for achieving “small victories” I believe it can be very healing to recognize what we have lost along the way and to say our goodbyes; perhaps with a little ritual, while being grateful for the good memories which we will always keep close to our heart.  

“This will allow our emotions to flow again; to rise and fall naturally and  bring a sense of closure, completion and peace” (guidebook)

Berkano and Four of Vessels - Get up and get going!

Today´s rune is Berkano (Birch). It is the rune of creative energie and the femine principle: The Empress of the Elder Futhark. The challenge of Berkano is to take care better of ourselves and to try to improve our  well-being; not only physically but also emotionally. Besides being a strong nurturing energy, Berkano also encourages us to give birth to our creative ideas. We can only gestate them for so long before they wither and die within us, which will cause us maybe more pain than the birthing process itself.

So what energy will help me to embrace the spirit of Berkano today? From the Wildwood Tarot I pulled: Four of Vessels- Boredom. Well this is a crystal clear advice. The only thing I have to do is to get up and to leave this energy devouring state of inactivity. 

While the traditional Four of Cups sometimes might be interpreted as meditation, nobody will belief this applies to the woman in the Four of Vessels. She obviously feels disconnected, stuck, sorry for herself, and she has created a black hole of despair inside of her. But holes can be filled,  if we only let the energy flow again. The only one who can begin this process is us. We have to ignite  that first spark. We have the key to open doors to new opportunities. So let’s get up,  turn around and step through the portal behind us. It may be scary but we already have everything we need to take this next step in our journey.

NB Perhaps this portal connects to the one from in the Yew tree of my previous post?

Eihwaz and The Knight of Bows

Today’s rune is Eihwaz (Yew). The Yew tree is an evergreen and will easily reach 600 years of age or more. It is a tree which often splits under the weight of advanced growth without succumbing to disease . It is easy to imagine that such a split could be a portal to the spirit realm. Eihwaz  is the rune of death and transformation, of standing at the crossroads.  I can relate to this rune very easily. Something has to change in order to move forward. Old victim stories, which are repeated over and over again, should be retold as heroic tales of overcoming great adversity. Letting go of old limiting thought patterns will make room for new ways of understanding.

So which energy will help me to bring about some change  in my life and I pulled the Knight of Bows from the Wildwood Tarot. The Knight of Wands in general  has a tendency to come up whenever I expect him the least. He is often a bit “too much in my face” when I am feeling down but he is also the one who gets his way with a nudge,  a smile and a motivating line. “Come on”, he says, “let’s make some fun! Don’t be such a party pooper and go on an adventure with me. I know the best places to go to.”

His charms are alluring and I can imagine myself wandering into the forest with him, without being afraid to go astray because he is walking right beside me. I am Feeling fearless and curious, enjoying each moment with an open mind, taking in the fragrant wisdom of the Wildwood, while putting my faith and trust in my red furred companion.

The Wheel - Carving out Space and Time

Question to draw a card with: How can I take care of myself during the last days of this year? And I got The Wheel from the DruidCraft Tarot.

Some keywords for this card are Completion  and beginning of a cycle.

For me this is a perfect card for the last out breath of this year. A time to  recuperate from the stressful Christmas season. Only one festivity to go and then the new year will begin. The priestess is drawing a circle with her wand, while holding a symbol of the wheel of the year in her other hand. The circle is almost completed. It is a symbol for a completed cycle but it is also a sacred space, out of time out of place, where we can recharge and/or ground ourselves and where we can connect with Spirit. It is so essential to carve out space and time for ourselves this time of year to withdraw from everyday distractions. This way we can reflect on what has been and what may come. This is the perfect time to set new intentions and let go of outdated beliefs.

I hope you will all be able to give yourself the gift of Space and Time these last few days of the year.  

My best Christmas gifts!

I wasn’t planning on blogging today but when I read Chloe’s post: “What Were Your Best ChristmasGifts?”

I was inspired to pull two cards to answer the following questions for myself. I used the Druidcraft Tarot since it is my “Christmas deck” for this year. I have been enjoying it so much; just looking at the pictures, discovering new details, pulling a card now and then and being amazed by its wisdom and evocative nature all over again.

So let’s dive in:

What is the best gift I gave this Christmas? – Ace of Swords

From the depth of my sometime murky unconscious  emerged one thought crystal clear: this Christmas is a brand new experience: a once in a life time Christmas. No need to stain it with regrets and/or high expectations of Christmases  past. This relaxed mindset allowed me to step into this year’s Christmas with my family and really enjoy it. My eldest daughter and her boyfriend and my husband all came to visit us and we had a very good and peaceful day. I was able to divide my energy with ease and even keep some for  myself.

What is the best gift I received this Christmas? – Three of Swords

All  the merriment and cheerfulness were like a healing balm for the lingering sadness which is always, one way or another, asking for attention during this season. But this year I felt no need to harden my heart so I could protect myself from feeling too much. No this year I felt like I could be truly be myself and that was a wonderful Christmas gift.

What were your gifts this year?

Ingwaz – Sitting with your shadows

Today’s Rune is Inguz or Ingwaz, named after the god Ing who is both a fertility god as well as a heroic god who traveled to the underworld. It is a rune of gestation and internal growth. This reminds me of the seed which has to wait in the darkness of the earth until it comes to life and is able to move towards the light. This process of sprouting takes time and requires al lot of strength and patience. 

I pulled a card to elaborate on this rune from the Wildwood tarot and I got the Five of Stones. 

This is  the card of hardship and the struggle to survive the challenges of life. I think this child is part of our inner hero. The one who keeps the fire of our heart burning even in times of stress and spiritual  starvation. She is not afraid to spend time in the dark cave; to sit with whatever asks for not only her attention but more so for her acceptance. This is an act which calls for great courage and resilience, because all too often with the first stirrings of our shadow we immediately tend to freeze and deny  it.

I suppose we each have our own dark cave. Mine is scary and cold but I did have found some treasures there and I am sure there are many more to be found. It is not easy to go there willingly but if we do “practice” this journey we will be more prepared when  life challenges you and we find ourselves sitting there unwillingly.

Uruz and the King of Bows – Strength and flexibility

My rune for this beautiful Winter day is Uruz (Aurochs). This is the rune of strength; both psychical and emotional and often also spiritual. It is the rune of courage, endurance and determination. This rune often comes up when you need a reminder that you are worth fighting for and that it is time to make a stand.

So what energy will help me to embrace the qualities of Uruz: the King of Bows - Adder from the Wildwood tarot. Together these two are  masculine energy squared.  The King of Bows aka the King of Wands is the personification of confidence, wisdom and strength. This is the third King in a short while to make his appearance into my life. Maybe it is time sit on the throne of my own life again.

Being in pain and/or just discomfort for two months in a row is not so beneficial for your mental well being.  I miss doing the things which make my heart sing. So yesterday I picked up a watercolor brush and  some paints and splashed some colors on a page. Did it hurt? Yes, a bit. Was is beautiful? Not particularly. But oh my god(dess) it made me so happy. I even hummed a bit. Sometimes when you are sitting on the fence of life for a long time, it is hard to get back in the saddle again. This process calls for the qualities of Uruz and especially the creative flexibility of the King of Bows. It might require taking some detours to achieve what makes me happy but I am positive I will get there. 

The Woodward and Queen of Vessels - There is no easy way out

Today’s word to draw a card with is "Crossroads" and I got The Woodward and Queen of vessels-Salmon from the Wildwood Tarot.

Some of my initial thoughts where: if anybody could make the right decisions to find his way out of the dark forest it is The Woodward. But even the strong and experienced Woodward needs some quiet time to collect his thoughts and weigh his options before his can make the right choice, not only for himself but also for his environment. I wonder if his cup is also filled with coffee just like mine is, when I am trying the make up my mind about what to do next and where to go from here.

Next I got the Queen of Vessels to add some  intuitive wisdom to this post. She is the living example that the best way is most often not the easiest way. It takes a whole lot of courage and determination to swim upstream but she knows without an doubt, this is the best choice for her and her future offspring.

She advises us to not only to make our decision based on our strength but also on our intuition because together these two aspects of ourselves can show us the way out of any forest.

“You can always take the easy way out and give up, but real strength comes, when you decide to keep pushing forward, no matter what the circumstances are”

Celtic lenormand – How to survive the last week of Summer?

For my daily draw I’ve used the Celtic Lenormand by Chloe McCracken and Will Worthington. First I’ve shuffled my deck thoroughly and then I searched for the sun card to represent the intense heat of this week. Then I picked up the two cards on either side of the sun, asking how to get through this week as good as possible.

And I drew: anchor + house and birds +letter:

Lenormand is sometimes such a blunt and direct tool and can tell you exactly what you already know. As if it is telling you: “why do you bother me with  trivial questions with such obvious answers! I am capable of so much more." And maybe it is right; I do tend to forget this tool when I need guidance for something. I also notice that I often return to the same decks and forget others entirely. And I do believe each system and each deck has its own individual quirks and qualities so this is a good reminder pay some more attention to my neglected decks. But I digress so let’s look at the cards: 

Anchor and house. 

Stay at home, especially during the hottest hours of the day.

Birds and letter

Write a blogpost, journal, phone a friend and talk with M about daily fun stuff and don’t start complaining  about how hot it is.

Anchor and letter

In Dutch we have a saying: “Who writes will remain” so I will take this as an encouragement to journal more elaborated this week. When it is so hot I tend to skip the juicy details and keep my entries more concised.

House and birds. 

Social gatherings at home. You're all invited! :D

Seven of Wands – A time to clear out the Dead Wood

For today I pulled the Seven of Wands from the Original Rider Waite Tarot and I picked its counterparts from the Wildwood Tarot and The Wild Unknown Tarot. 

When I pulled this card, the first thing that came to mind was of course “standing up for your beliefs” but when I saw the other two cards, I was reminded of how some of us (including myself), struggle with too many creative idea’s, passions and whatever keeps our heart and soul occupied. That got me thinking about the concept of pruning. After the Summer our garden looks a bit like a jungle. Some of our plants, like the Wisteria, even grow offshoots which almost strangle you when you walk past them. But if you want to have flowers and the next year you have to master the art of pruning. Prune too much and the plant will wither and die, too little and all its energy will go to maintaining all the excess branches and leaves instead of growing new flowers. In short we have to prune our non viable ideas (for now) to give room to our most  passionate desire to come to fruition. And perhaps maybe you will be amazed by how rich and luscious your creative talents will grow and develop.

“People think focus means saying yes to the thing you’ve got to focus on. But that’s not what it means at all. It means saying no to the hundred other good ideas that there are. You have to pick carefully.” Steve Jobs

Soulcards and Laguz – Don't keep the lid on

My Rune for today is Laguz, meaning water or lake. This is the rune of feelings and emotions, of the unconscious and of the hidden and unknown. Combined with this Soulcard from Soulcards 2 it is obvious how unhealthy it is to bottle up feelings and emotions and to keep them under a heavy lid. One way or another they will always find a way to surface and always when you’ll expect it the least.  This intense screaming inside will hurt us so much more then expressing our troubling feelings when they arise. Sometimes our cover can be so strong and impenetrable, it might even be possible we cannot hear our own soul screaming. But what if we do hear it, what to do about it?

And then I pulled the Six of Pentacles from the Original Rider Waite Tarot. The first thing that came to mind was asking for help to someone we trust. Because obviously  we are left with little to give like in the Six of Pentacles of the Wildwood tarot. The card from the Deviant Moon Tarot advises me to keep some of my time and resources for myself when others come to ask for my help after I have recuperated from this emotional tidal wave . My initial response is always give, give, give and that’s okay as long as I don’t exploit myself.

Today after a very busy morning and afternoon I am claiming some space and time for myself to do the things I love most… and maybe take a peek under that lid…

King of Pentacles – Our Pater Familias came to the party

Today’s card is the King of Pentacles from the Original Rider Waite Tarot, the Wild Unknown Tarot and the Wildwood Tarot. He is the patriarch, the provider and the defender of the family. He is strong, confident, skillful and  just. The perfect leader of his pack or herd.

For me not always an easy court card to interpret but for today it reminds me of my dad. “Family comes first” was his credo. He has worked his whole life hard to provide for us and after he had retired he could find joy in the simple pleasures of life: coffee, a walk, good book etc.  Yesterday it was M. her birthday and although he isn’t with us anymore in a way he was very present. Somehow it started when in the morning I gave M a kiss to congratulate her with her birthday. Suddenly I saw such a strong resemblance of my dad in her, which I’d never seen before because she is the spitting image of my mother and me. Throughout the day, when other family members arrived,  we kept seeing other family resemblances in one another. Some of us who were always compared to my mom suddenly also looked like my dad or vice versa but one way or another my dad was always part of the conversation. The King of Pentacles from the Original Rider Waite Tarot is connected to the earth by an overgrowth of winding and binding vines. This symbolizes today for me my dad is always with us; connected to us through his Love for us and his  Dna in us. And if  miss him we only have to look in our heart for him or ...in the mirror

The Magician - On your mark, get set, go!

My card for today is The Magician from the Original Rider Waite Tarot. Since I am participating in the Tarotperspective Experience on IG,  I pulled the Magician card also from the Wild Unknown Tarot and the Wildwood Tarot in order to deepen my understanding of this card.

What stands out almost immediately is the motionless posture of the three Magicians. It is almost  as if they are waiting for the signal to come into action. And when I am writing this, I realize it is me who needs to give the starting shot: steady ready go!

Then this big wild strong wildcat will run towards whatever his mind is focused on, the magician will channel the energy from above to whatever he wants to manifest in his life and the Shaman will share his knowledge how to travel into your inner realms to heal what needs to be healed in order to move on

I like how the tree Magicians each has his own expertise and how together they build such a more in depth description of this archetype.

For me today he urges me to get going and move forward toward the things that make me happy and feel confident. Beside knitting socks I have an art journal page to finish which I was putting off again and again. Getting back into artjournaling is really a magical experience. I never know what will happen if I put my first layers of paint on the  page. Most of the times it unfolds effortlessly and I just have to follow along, which is so relaxing. How strange that I keep myself from enjoying this practice so often

Anyway the Magician has get me going again, so next post will be my finished art journal page!

My thoughts on The IG Tarotspective Experience

my setup and six decks that might play along

In less than three days July has come to an end, so several new tarot challenges for August are promoted on IG. Among them is the Tarot “Experience” called  #tarotperspective   created by Kelly from @thetruthinstory and Patrick from @inthe78cards The fact that they call the Tarotperspective an experience was the reason I wanted to find out what this was all about. I’ve come to realize that I am not that good with IG challenges. Such a challenge is often a collection of 30/31 prompts to draw your daily card with. It puts too much pressure on me and when I am not able to complete a challenge it feels a bit like failure.
This Experience is supposed to be different. The goal is to choose one core deck and two additional decks. From the core deck you’ll pull, after shuffling, a card and from the additional decks you'll find its counterpart. When you sit with these cards you’ll experience how your understanding of the card you've pulled will grow and  become more layered. There are no prompts or questions. You don’t have to show up every day and you're free to tailor this Experience to your own liking. Some people  chose more than two additional decks or some will rotate them weekly.

Example with the Death card

For me it is certain I will pick the Original Rider Waite Tarot  as my core deck. The Rider Waite Tarot is the deck I started out with many years ago. It is a highly trusted, well read, and deeply loved deck. I want to broaden my perspective of the archetypes in this deck. I want to deepen my relationship with its characters and I want to add some fresh insights to the mix of meanings I have for each card of this deck. The more I think about it the more excited I become to participate in this challe… no, experience!

I am not sure which additional decks I will choose. Perhaps I will choose several and let

empty beds

my intuition guide me which decks want to enlighten me about my daily draw. Or I might just end up using two of the ones I’ve picked; we’ll see.

If you are on Instagram maybe you would like to join in and if you’re not, you might like trying to do this for yourself