Monday, May 11, 2015

Afraid in the dark spread – Be brave

The Wild Unknown Tarot, Ten of Swords. Runes. MannazFor my daily draw, I am doing a two card spread. I hope it will clarify some doubts I have about my healing process. I feel there is still a lot of anxiety blocking me from going forward. I will use my runes for the first position and the Wild Unknown Tarot for the second one
The spread is called: “Afraid in the dark spread”.  I've found it somewhere on the internet a long time ago:

1 What am I afraid of? – Mannaz - self

A well-known self confidence issue I guess. When do I stop apologizing for being me? When do I start believing in the wonderful me that  I am. And when do I stop hiding this woman for the rest of the world. It is so hard to live an authentic life. To embrace both the light and the dark aspects of myself. I don’t have to be perfect;  I just have to be brave enough to be me

2 What will turn the light on - Ten of Swords

Well this is definitely not the card I wished for. I would have preferred something like the Ace of Cups. But fate has decided otherwise. Ten swords are sticking in this massive bull. The last sword has even blinded him. This is a low as a person can go: Beaten down by his outdated and ridged thought patterns and fears. Before we can move on, our stubborn like a bull of an ego has to hit rock bottom and has to let go of everything he believed in including his melodramatic stories of “poor me”.
Today is new day and we can build up our Self, our Mannaz, one step at the time, filling it with confidence and inner strength: with ideas  and stories  which will empower instead of crush us.
So in the end this card was a appropriate gift for today. A gift which heralds change and a bright future ( look how the upper half of this card is more bright than the lower half)
(NB. Rereading this post and my previous one, it seems that the issue of self confidence  is a reoccurring theme in my daily draws)

13 comments:

  1. I was curious as to what James Ricklef's book "Tarot Affirmations" would have to say about the Ten of Swords since it falls in a "do this" spot. The one quote that stuck out to me was: "Experience life without over-analyzing it." That's something I have trouble doing too!

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    1. For me this is difficult too. I am kind of a brooder and a thinker. Swords is the suit I identify the most with.
      It is a great affirmation for people like us. :)

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  2. I love when you combine cards with runes.

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    1. It amazes me how well they fit together! :)

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  3. This is somewhat of a relieving combination, in that the 10 of Swords can be so encouraging insofar as being aware of the need to let go and rebuild. I love how you are using the runes in combination with the Tarot. I might try that out as I haven't used my runes in a while!

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    1. The more I use them in combination with the tarot the more natural it feels
      "The Need to let go" refers seamlessly back to Nauthiz of my previous post :D
      Please let me know your experiences when you do start using your runes again

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  4. First, let me say thank you for beginning to use the runes. At least a year ago they called to me. I purchased a book, Nordic Runes by Paul Rhys Mountfort, a few months ago. But, I kept telling myself to wait till had completed other activities.

    His interpretation of Mannaz is different than you have in your post. I've noticed different sources on the web produce different interpretations. I think you'll appreciate this alternate version. I've been pulling a rune and then writing down shorten versions of his words. I've only pulled two so far, Mannaz was one of those.

    Humanity: mannaz (Man) - gifts, talents, abilities; unleashing creative potential; love/relationships

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    1. I agree with you that there are so many interpretations of the runes. Mannaz if often associated with the Magician.So the unleashing creative potential is certainly one of its aspects as are many more. When I combine a rune with a tarot card I usually chose the aspect which speaks to me most clearly and for this reading is was the fear of all these human qualities; of being myself, of being (wo)man
      Being a member of society is an aspect of Mannaz to me but ion my opinion love and relationships are for me more connected to Gebo and or Wunjo
      So you see reading the runes is a very subjective and intuitive subject. I am glad you like these posts and I am looking forward to hear more of you personal experiences with the runes

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  5. I really appreciate your interpretation of these Tarot-Rune combinations, Ellen. And that spread looks to be a very useful one. I must try it sometime.

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    1. Thanks Zanna. Yes it is a very useful spread: short and swift. Just the way I like them. Sometimes I like to pick the first card face up to represent my fear and then draw the second one to tell me how to face it

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  6. Self-confidence is a work in progress. Guilt and shame are mostly unproductive personally but do serve a purpose as a conscience gauge, but mostly these two spiritually debilitating feelings are crippling and unhealthy in my experience. I had to learn about both and then know, understand and believe I am so much more then a guilt and shamed based human being, and then I began to free myself from that heavy burden.

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    1. It is almost as I am excavating my true self from under thick layer of debris of made of shame and guilt gathered over the years. It feels freeing but also a bit vulnerable as if those layers were in their own way a kind of protection too

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  7. That's a great description Ellen.

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