Five of Pentacles - Poor me!

Today’s card is the Five of Pentacles from the Original Rider Waite Tarot. This is the card of lack and poverty in whatever way we can imagine: Physical health, time, money, housing, stuff (more tarotdecks  J) etc. 

I often call this card: My “poor me” card, because even though sometimes I do feel like the Five of Pentacles, objectively I don’t have any reason to. I have a house, I have food on the table, I am healthy  and I have time enough to do the things I love. Conclusion: If I have the energy of this card hovering over me, it is usually because of the sad stories I tell myself: I am too tired, I am not fit enough, I am too busy, I don’t l have the money to buy myself those beautiful things other people have etc.

So  I asked my cards what to do next and I got the Four of Pentacles.  This was not at all what I expected. This card is often seen as the miser card, the card of thrift and greed. At first I thought I should be more grateful for what I do have instead of letting myself be put down by my own sense of lack. Of course this always a good thing to do but besides that, this card reminds me of clinging to the stories I tell myself over and over again. Even though scarcity is most often experienced in the physical world, I think it usually is the result of what we think. Imagine all the things the guy in the Four of Pentacles is telling himself. He is still such a long way from the sharing position of the Six of Pentacles. 

For today I will try to let go of the internal messages of lack, so the sun can come out to melt the snow in my card of the day.

Berkano and the Five of Pentacles – Self-care is so important

Today's Rune is Berkano (Birch), the rune of the Divine Feminine, the archetypal  mother, creativity, fertility and growth. The corresponding tarot card is of course The Empress. But this is not the card which I drew for myself today. That would be the Five of Pentacles. This is almost the opposite of Berkano: poverty and stagnation, insecurity about ourselves and about our circumstances.

So what is the message for today? Berkano urges us to wrap ourselves in a warm soft cloak of self-care when we feel low. I suppose a lot of us, including myself, are a bit worn out by the enduring cold, wet and grey weather. When I feel like this, I  do have a tendency to neglect myself and focus even more on the welfare of others. There is just not enough energy for me left.  Maybe it should be more the other way around. First get myself back on my feet and when I feel good about myself, I would be so much more able to be there for others. Sometimes it only takes a rune and a tarot card to show me what is really important for me now:

Ways to take care of myself:

Take a long shower with soft scented lotions

Make a nice hot cup of coffee

Light some candles

Listen to music

Eat milk chocolate with hazel nuts

Flip through my favorite deck

Meditate

Moisturize my skin

Take a walk

Make art

Read a fantasy novel

Watch a movie

Apply some, (not too much) make up

Any more idea’s???

Three of Pentacles- adapting my creative choices

Today’s card is the Three of Pentacles from the Tarot of the Hidden Realm. Here we see an older Fey man; a skilled craftsman busy in his workshop. He is creating torcs, an ancient type of jewelry. They were often used to identify the wearer as a person of high rank. The craftsman is enjoying his work and the process of creating. First there is the vision of the torc he wants to create and then trough his hands this idea slowly becomes tangible.

When I look at his card I feel somewhat envious. Probable because I miss my creative outlet. Usually I am going to my craft room quite regularly and there I play with paint and paper scraps.This is my “humming time”

But since Jofee has arrived, a lot has changed.  But is this really the main reason why I am not creating? I pulled another card and I had to laugh out loud! 

Of course: My girls are both ill. Although M is recovering slowly, S is feeling a lot worse. And I feel like the comforting woman in the Five of Pentacles, taking care of them both. And most important watching Jofee for them. Now I realize this is only temporary. When everybody is up and about again, there will be enough time for me to go to my “workshop”. For the time being I have brought my watercolors and my watercolor pencils downstairs. These  art supplies won’t  make such a mess and I can leave on the table until I can find some spare moments to play and hum…

Five of Rainbows – The Outsider opens the gate

For today I've drawn the Five Of Rainbows (Pentacles) from the Osho Zen tarot.

“A small child is standing on one side of a gate, looking through it. He is so small, and so convinced that he cannot get through. He cannot see that the chain holding the gate is not locked; all he has to do is open it.

Whenever we feel 'left out', or excluded, it brings up this feeling of being a small, helpless child. It is not surprising, as the feeling is deeply rooted in our earliest childhood experiences. The problem is that, because it is so deeply rooted, it plays over and over again, like a tape, in our lives.”

This card is telling me to stop doubting myself. To stop imagining what other people might think of me. I have been disappointed in people many times, many ways. Always thinking there had to be something wrong with me. That I wasn't good enough. I was raised to be a people pleaser and when I didn't feel accepted I always thought I hadn't done enough to get them to like me. When I look at this card I even think maybe the chain is the child’s way of keeping the bad world outside; afraid to get hurt again.

But lately I have come to realize there is nothing wrong with me. I am  good just the way I am right now. I've learned to accept and yes, to truly love myself. I know I am precious and worthy of Love. So let’s open the gate and step into the world full of rainbow colors!

Five of Pentacles – a helping hand

After having pulled rather challenging cards the last two day, I decided to draw today’s card with a positive question in mind:  “What can I do right now, in this moment that will bring me pleasure and also positively impact my future” (Sasha Graham). I’ve written about the origin of this question in a previous post.

How happy I was with my decision when I pulled the Five of Pentacles; an obvious example of a again a challenging card. It felt almost as if the tarot was pulling a prank on me. In this depiction we see an elderly couple sitting under a make-do shelter covered with snow. This card is about deprivation, poverty and physical, mental or material hardship.

“But this card does also imply that comfort can be found in such situations in partners, friends or unexpectedly compassionate strangers. The card invites us to look for help and to accept help that is offered to us”(guidebook). So that is the positive side of this card.

In answer to my question; I will look for how I can  be compassionate to others and how I can try to gracefully accept offered help. The last part is the most difficult because I usually want to do everything myself so it will good for me to learn to depend on others too. 
This morning somebody friendly let me cut in line at the grocery store and when I came home my girls offered to put the groceries. So it was a good start of my day
I love it how the question has  determined the atmosphere of this reading J

Today I am grateful and accepting for a helping hand, either mentally or physically

Tarot Exercise - Creating your own Wish list

For today I wanted to write about a little exercise I've created: Creating your own magical wish list

Sometimes we exactly know what we want and we  can wish for it. But other times our desires remain a bit foggy and cloudy. Deep down we know, we feel what we want, but it is difficult to put words to those feelings. Now isn't it handy  we have a deck of 78 cards which contains numerous words which pop up immediately when even we look at such a card. Yes, tarot can be our instant wish list. Similar to my Gift boxexercise this is a free association game, which is also a fun way to get acquainted with a new deck.

So this is how is goes:You sit quietly with you deck, shuffle it thoroughly, pick a card, say : “I wish…...”  and turn the card around. Then say whatever comes to mind and that will be your wish. You can repeat this as often as you want and wish and wish and wish…..

These are a few of my wishes, triggered by The Hidden Realm Tarot:

Life Renewed: I wish it was Autumn

Ten of Cups: I wish I was a more passionate cook

Feary stallion: I wish I could go horseback riding along the seashore

Nine of Swords: I wish could let go of fearful thoughts more easy

Five of Pentacles: I wish I could be more compassionate

You might want to put the most prominent and surprising wishes on you altar or a cabinet so you won’t forget what you've wished for.

When you want to take it one step further you could rephrase your wishes (passive) into affirmations (active): “I  wish I was a more passionate cook” versus “I am a talented cook who enjoys to cook a tasteful dinner for her family”

I hope you will enjoy this little exercise 

Five of pentacles - Sticking together

For today I've drawn the Five of Pentacles from the Morgan Greer Tarot and I wanted to try to answer the question which has been popping up lately on various tarot blogs( including my own):

“What can I do right now in this moment that will bring me pleasure and also positively impact my future?”

I can think of easier cards to answer this question with, but I will give it a try. The key is to not to focus on what is lacking in this card; which is a lot but instead focus on what it still there.

When we have lost a lot: finance, security, health and other Pentacle aspects, it is good to focus on friends and loved ones. The two people in the card hold on to each other and find comfort together. They give each other the strength to keep going  and perhaps even endure more hardships. In my opinion the emotional bond of love and friendship is often strengthened in a Five of Pentacles situation. In times of need you know who will be there for you (and who won’t) Together you often can overcome the most stressful situations.

So for today I will be grateful for what we do have (love, friendship, togetherness) instead of complaining about what we don’t have. This will impact us positively for the future because we will grow more closely together and we will appreciate each other even more.

Another spread for Self Love

A few weeks ago I've posted a spread for self love for Valentine´s day. Yesterday I've discovered a great website called "Little Red tarot". There I saw a post with another “awesome” Self love spread for this Holiday. But hé, self love is for every day of the year and since I adore this little three/four card spread so much, I wanted to post it here. So (drum roll)…. Here it is:

“The ‘Me Myself and I, aka Why I Am Totally AwesomeTarot Spread”

1. What’s totally awesome about me is…

2. My favorite thing about myself is…
3. I am brilliant because…

And if that hasn't sorted you out, go right ahead and pull one more card:

4. One reason it doesn't matter if I have one lover, three partners or no sweetie at all is…  

I guess this is the Valentine’s day position, so for now I like to call this extra card: the loving/caring action for myself right now

It is in the nature of this spread to read it in a quick, positive and intuitive way. Just see it as a pat on the back whenever you need it.

So let’s give it a try:

 

Crystal Visions Tarot

 1 What’s totally awesome about me is…

Five of wands – I have a lot of creative ideas running around my mind: I just have to pick one…

2 My favorite thing about myself is…

Strength – I am  a compassionate , strong woman

3 I am brilliant because….

Five of Pentacles – Even in times of need I always take care of my family

4 How can I love myself right now?

Ace of Wands - I will pick one creative inspired idea and  I will  go do it!

I highly recommend this spread because it feels só good! The cards give you compliments you would not have thought of yourself. Even this reading with two fives has been so delightful

Recipe for emotional resilience: Let go and let Love

Today I asked the cards: When I am following The Hermit into my inner Wildwood what will I find or who will I meet and which little faery will come to my support?  

I placed The Hermit card from yesterday in the middle and I drew first the Five of Stones – Endurance from the Wildwood Tarot. Immediately I felt mixture of pity and envy. On the one hand she is all alone in the wilderness, but on the other hand she is all alone in the wilderness and no this is not a typing error. How many times have I longed to be all alone  I how many times have I feared to be left all alone. The book that came to mind when I was looking at this card was part two of the series “Earth’s Children” by Jean Auel: “The valley of the horses”, where Ayla lives alone for three years in cave and sustains herself and has the strength to endure the hardship she comes across.

The guidebook speaks  about a time of protecting ourselves perhaps by withdrawal to build up  emotional resilience. For me this girl has been through a whole lot and although she is tough she isn't there yet.

So who will help us to find this resilience? The singer of Healing from The Faeries’ Oracle. Again a singer and I like that. This card teaches us that healing is an active process which requires our best efforts. It is not something we can receive and then expect to be healed. “Through the song of healing, we may be restored and renewed, but only if the wounded one is prepared to forgive and let go, returning to love and compassion…We need only to let go of things that are hurting us and nurture ourselves with the things that benefit us. So simple, so difficult.”

Soon it will be Christmas. This is a time my emotional resilience will be tested for sure. I want to give everybody that warm cozy holiday feeling but not at my own expense so it will be a balancing act. I want to focus on the love I can give to my family and not on the chaos and stress around these days (cooking shopping, baking decorating, quarreling etc)

Anyway, I am hopeful that my meditation and gratitude practice will help me to open up for the healing energy of Divine J